Maybe we’re Misusing the Word “Superhero”
I’m the first guy to overuse a phrase – I use “dude” in every variation known to grammar. But even I have to take pause at the misuse, and overuse, of the word “superhero.” Not every action one takes make him a freakin’ “superhero.” However, I am giving the guy who untangled the space shuttle this morning with his own two hands a pass (after all, he was floating in space).
I will not use this space to tout the noble spirit, fearless nature, or snappy outfits of the superheroic. But I’m not going to use the word to sell you a cellphone either (Verizon, I’m looking in your general direction…).
Below are headlines plucked from these here internets this past week misappropriating “superhero” for the subject’s own ends.
Xylitol: a Superhero in Crusade Against Cavities
A sugar substitute designed to sweeten coffee CANNOT be a superhero. Maybe if Captain Clean Mouth weaponized it to battle King Cavity I’d consider it super, but even then …
Winner of Tax Superhero Award Announced
I am happy that the winner of this award is assuring that taxes are used for legitimate and helpful purposes. I really am. But can’t they call it something else? “Tax superhero” sounds like an ad for an accountant in April.
The Superhero is You
No it’s not. It’s most likely not you either.
Stuntman Superhero Enjoys the High Life..!
This guy is a street performer. Superheroes don’t work for tips.
Verizon Wireless and LG Mobile Phones Connect Customers to the Superhero Within
“VARIANT COVER” – A comic book produced with different covers for the express purpose of having you, the comic fan boy, boy multiple copies of the same thing. Sometimes many covers will create a larger tapestry or work of art; others will be in 3-D; or have alternative concepts. We all love art or we [...]
1) Saw 8: The Reality Television Gameshow 2)Live action movie of Hungry, Hungry Hippos 3)The Tonight Show, starring Chewbacca 4) Deadpool vs. Punisher: The Musical 5) The Human Centipede sleeping bag 6) C-Span Live Action Role Playing Group 7) The new Texas Chainsaw Massacre ride at Six Flags Over Texas 8) Your Parents Basement is Always [...]
The single camera glory that was Barney Miller can probably never be reproduced. There’s heavy debate in the office whether it should be or not. It was essentially a 22-minute, 3-act play with minimal characters and only one set (after Season One that also featured Barney’s dining room at home). The thing is, the writing [...]
Yep. Most of the high school biggies were our man, Hughes. But if you can name the 1980s high school movie quotes listed below, your might have been paying attention to something else in ’88 other than the MTV Beach House and that cute girl with freckles in your 11th grade Chemistry class. 5)”Last night, [...]
This Weekend is legendary Indy 500. Please don’t think geekdom is limited to cosplay and app programming. Oh no, my friends. Two years ago our Mid-West correspondent, Billy D, and I watched those car dorks jump a humongous Hot Wheels truck over a bunch of school busses and twice as many drunks while Florence Henderson [...]
Attention lonely geeks! “Drunk” is only a superpower at Red Sox games and ex-girlfriends’ weddings.
MONDAY – Movies. Their glory and their hilarious tragedy.
TUESDAY – Television. Our favorite drug; constant and comforting, but often packaged with regret.
WEDNESDAY – Wildcards! Probably a piece of weird fiction in which Spider-Man has to talk down Laura Ingles from making a bad decision.
THURSDAY – Thesis-level Dorkdom. Jargon, geek terms and weird insight explained for the rest of us.
FRIDAY – Fantasy, Sci-fi, and comics. Like living in your parents’ basement only without the inherent desperation. Well…