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The Daily Jim

All the wit that's fit to spit

Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Does Sloth Still Love Chunk? You Bet Your Ass He Does!

In 1985 I had the usual assortment of heroes – Evel Kinevel, late Yankee catcher, Thurman Munson, and Han Solo.  But topping them all was Data from The Goonies.  What kid doesn’t want oil slick shoes and a grappling hook?  Ol’ Data was the uncool James Bond of the Goon Docks.  But it was okay, because much like my neighborhood, everyone was uncool; so we all saw the movie about six times.

I’ve got to give it to Senor Spielberg-o; Goonies was a game changer. It had the depressing, small town as prison ascetic of All the Right Moves paired with the opening, big rock sequence from Raiders of the Lost Ark and just enough Scooby Doo to have kept you wondering if One-Eyed Willy, the pirate, was going to jump out.  Josh Brolin gets the girl. Sloth love Chunk. Samwise Rudy doesn’t need his inhaler anymore.  And The Goonies save their home. Oh yeah, and Corey Feldman, while dressed as Michael Jackson, still gets to kiss Martha Plimpton.  The Goon Docks continue to be holy ground for our passed youth.

In fact, my intern, Ben, still regularly eats Baby Ruth’s and dances the Truffle Shuffle (although I’ve made several requests that he not).  Try walking into a bar anywhere across this great nation and yell, “Goonies never say ‘die!’” I am pretty certain that someone will buy you a beer … and it will probably be me.

Goonies

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  • Anonymous

    “I smell ice cream.”

  • triciafox

    “I smell ice cream.”

  • http://thenflfan0829.wordpress.com/ Kurtis Imamura

    That was a fantastic article. I do not agree with every single thing that you said but still great nonetheless. On a side note, I am so happy that the NFL is back. It seems like I been patiently waiting forever. This has to be my favorite time of the year. Sorry, I’m rambling. lol

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Dailies

Attention lonely geeks! “Drunk” is only a superpower at Red Sox games and ex-girlfriends’ weddings.

Gentleman Jim

  • MONDAY – Movies. Their glory and their hilarious tragedy.  

  • TUESDAY – Television.  Our favorite drug; constant and comforting, but often packaged with regret.  

  • WEDNESDAY – Wildcards! Probably a piece of weird fiction in which Spider-Man has to talk down Laura Ingles from making a bad decision.  

  • THURSDAY – Thesis-level Dorkdom. Jargon, geek terms and weird insight explained for the rest of us.  

  • FRIDAY – Fantasy, Sci-fi, and comics.  Like living in your parents’ basement only without the inherent desperation. Well…